Almost 100 years ago, Elizabeth Hurlock’s students shocked her with their performance.
Hurlock divided her students into two groups. The first group, she told them what they had done wrong on a test. She then advised them how to improve.
For the second group, she focused only on what they had done right. She ignored what mistakes they had made. It was as if the mistakes did not exist.
The first group made a 19% improvement.
The question is: how much improvement did the second group make?
What would you guess? Double the performance of group one?
They made a 71% improvement!
That is 3 and a half times better outcome. A full 273% better outcome by focusing on the positive only.
Perhaps I can get a better outcome in life’s tasks and challenges by patting myself on the back for what I did right. Rather than berating myself for what I did wrong?
Might this work for you?
Consider celebrating your wins big and small.
Resource: Dale Williams TED talk:
Resource: Chapter from The Zen of Joy: http://zenofjoy.com/
We are our own toughest critics. In our western culture, we have been taught not only to be critical of our selves, but also to beat ourselves up for our mistakes—big and small. Even though the best of intentions may be behind that teaching, let’s ask ourselves, “When are we at our most productive?”
Is it when someone has yelled at us for a mistake we made? Don’t we retreat into a shell when that happens? Is this an empowered state to be in? Is this feeling state the most conducive to being creative or to being more productive? Or….
Are we more productive when we have been praised? When someone notices what a good job we did and says, “Well done. You did a great job.” I’ll bet dollars to doughnuts you said we are more likely to be productive when we are praised and feel worthy and really feel we have made a difference. If that is the case, how can we feel that more and more? Here’s how: Celebrate Our Wins—Big and Small.
Whenever you have a “win,” whatever it may be, celebrate it. Now, the first thing is recognizing a “win.” A win is whenever we do something right. And guess what? We do all kinds of things right all the time. We have been conditioned to gloss over them and just notice our mistakes! We have even been conditioned to downplay our “wins” and feel uncomfortable when someone compliments us. Many of us even pooh-pooh our accomplishments, “Oh, that! That’s nothing.”
As Einstein said, “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” We all, each of us, have unique talents and skills. The tragedy is that we have been taught or conditioned not to value them. My mother had an uncanny ability to draw caricatures of people, which she did in pencil, that were at once humorous and also captured the essence of the individual in unique way. She never showed them outside the immediate family, thought nothing of them and did not even save them. It was a talent that went unheralded, except in later years, I finally saw the talent. She did not value those drawings nor her ability as anything special. But it was a unique talent.
This double whammy of pooh-poohing our own talents and skills and at the same time keenly looking for and finding our mistakes and faults means we are not living in good feelings or living in “the flow.” Being “in the flow” is where the magic happens. Feeling energized by praise for a job well done means we have the momentum to keep going and enjoy the process. Really enjoying what we are doing allows us to be more efficient, more effective and more productive at what we do. So, how do we get into “the flow?” Celebrate All Wins!
You can start right now. Because you are reading this, you are in the small minority of people who are actually taking action to improve themselves. Most do not. Most want a pill to take or someone else to do it for them.
So celebrate that, right here, right now. Right now make a fist with your right hand (or left if it is the dominant hand). Reach out and up with your fist, palm side up. Bring your fist down and back to your side strongly and say, “YES!” out loud. Do it again, even stronger. What does this do? It “anchors” the win, the feeling of accomplishment in your body. It takes ownership of the accomplishment.
It means you are taking credit for your success. You are praising yourself and rightfully so! What else does this do? By triggering good feelings in the body, it is now easier to move on to the next task at hand in a more positive frame of mind, or “state” of being or feeling in the body. This helps to ensure you are bringing more of your abilities, skills and, yes, talents to bear on the next item on your list, to your next task, your next challenge. Also, this gives you a “tool” you can use to power your way through the inevitable challenges you will face in the future.
How? The next time you feel fear and/or anxiety, you can use this action of fist pumping to release the fear and access the “winning state” in your body. When next you feel fear or anxiety, simply pump your fist and say, “YES!” out loud again. You will immediately access the previous successful or winning state in your body and be fully empowered to access your abilities, skills and talents on the fear-inducing challenge.
Your mission for this week, should you decide to accept: Look for things you are doing right. Celebrate them with the fist pump and the “YES!” out loud. If you are in a public place and it is inappropriate to yell, just do a small pump and say “YES!” silently to yourself. Do this as much as you can for this week, any chance you get.
Thanks to Blair Singer for this. https://www.blairsinger.com
To Your Joy, Energy and Health,
Mission: To help you take shortcuts to More Joy, Energy, Health and fulfillment in life.
Find out How to Feel Authentic Joy, Even When Unhappy http://joyenergyandhealth.com
Includes: 108 Tips for More Joy, Energy and Health delivered once a week to your inbox…until you say stop. J
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The Zen of Joy. How to Rewire Your Brain for Happiness & Success. http://zenofjoy.com
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